So I admit, a lot of the decisions I’ve been making lately have not been s great. My priorities are mixed up. I’m not trying to hurt anyone and it sucks that this keeps happening. I could tell in her voice that she was hurt and I know that when we talk later its not going to be good. But I hope she knows that I love her and I really wanted to be there for her. If I knew that my first decision would have led to me missing out on something so big, I wouldn’t have made it. But I’m still learning and trying to grow, like everyone else. I just hope I don’t lose my family in the process.